addition.

so on i go
with number 2.

just like date:
10.22.16

or the time:
2:22a

if you add up the dates:
it’s 48.

that’s a good number,
considering:

i give myself
another
15
years–

seems close enough.

if you add up the time:
it’s 6.

that’s a good number,
because, frankly:

i
just
like
that
number.

two methods,
addition
makes sense.

because that is
how i see it:

number 2.

perception–
mine a bit silly,
but still my own.

and
honestly,
entertains me,
perhaps too much.

but,
my purple,
your yellow–
a duplicate
never,
am i.

nor you.

my strength today:
number 2.
number 6.
lasting 48.

perception,
addition,
my view.

10.13.16

in sea of sadness,
in sea of despair,
while i may be floating
i’m lost and it’s there.

on some days wild storms
bring showers with might,
and lightning and thunder
well into the night.

on others the sun
shines, skies are blue
but floating alone
i see clouds through my view.

should i just sink?
should i let go of hope?
should i let go my buoy
and unclasp the rope?

it seemed that i might,
then appeared–as a dream,
on vessel of hope,
kind fate intervened.

i bless this sweet spirit
that rescued from sea,
a sodden and salty,
but now smiling me.

the tl.

welcome to
those left
beat,
from this hood
these very streets.

strewn strown limp pimp
crashed-crashed-crashed.

vices. 
venom.
victims.
vaoid.

hollowed eyes avoid.
steer clear purer hearts.
some prey on fear.

jungle blocks.
beggar wretch.
clothing rags.
a fix to fetch.

as day pass:
shit.
then smear.
voices.
chanting.
more orders clear.

hopeless,
hapless,
derelict–
minds no more,
their life affect.

o

smiles.

romping roamers
we may be,
two small chi’s
and one sea bee.

dashing, weaving
through the ‘loin,
where we are begged
for our last coin.

which try, we give,
because–why not?
i may not have,
but some’ve forgot.

through drugs and trash
and all that’s crass,
there are still those
who don’t harass.

unlikely gem,
(gave first a fright!)
flashed toothy grin
(so i delight!).

pause i did,
paraphrase will,
this small exchange
my heart did fill–

“who let these,
these dogs out?”
“me!” said i,
(more as a shout).

“but hardly dogs,
they’re two small chi’s!”
so laugh we did,
and laughed with ease.

while black was he
and white am i,
in truth, were just
two passing by.

as it should be,
and as it was,
jokes flowed free,
believe because

while birth may dole
a hampered place,
kind souls shine
an unbought grace.

with this exchange,
our laughter rings,
each past forgot as
smiles this brings.

lost.

it is impossible
for me,
to comprehend
how one sees me.

actions, reactions,
i’ve been told,
don’t make sense,
as facts unfold.

those close to me,
(or so i think)
oft hold against,
and thus i sink.

the bottom line
of being sane,
are boundaries
which must not wane.

it cannot be
the best choice,
that when afraid
don’t use my voice,

i let and let
and let some more,
and welcome those
bad through my door.

one day when,
(i hope i’m strong)
i’ll figure what
is right from wrong.

but for now,
i must accept,
that it’s me
i can’t protect.

i’m not sure
if this will come,
’cause as i’ve grown,
i’ve become

a girl who just
cannot tell,
those wishing bad
and wishing well.

confusing as
this may sound,
i feel i don’t
deserve my ground.

wanting always
to be nice,
it’s now myself
i sacrifice.

how i should act,
what i should be,
i’ve no clue–
it’s lost to me.